Conversations with Gollum

The Other Lamm and I have set in motion an insane plan to change our lives completely. We’ve done this sort of thing before, but not nearly to this degree. As expected, this process has been an even mix of thrilling and terrifying, and I don’t imagine it’s going to get easier. We’ll see, though.

So far, we’re midway through steps one and two.

Step 1: Get rid of nearly everything we own. This includes furniture, artwork, keepsakes, lots of kitchen utensils. It’s not as easy as I figured it would be. For the furniture, you really want to sell it, since it was pricey to begin with, but people just aren’t buying a lot these days. For keepsakes, you know, you think you can just dump them… until you look at a thing, hold it in your hands, and remember that long-dead relative who gave it to you. And I have this added guilt whenever I get rid of an item I was told to treasure.

gollum happy
Never throw this VCR away. It has all metal parts. They don’t make these any more. This is a precious, precious thing.

But… it’s a VCR.

gollum angryKEEP THE PRECIOUS!

Books are just impossible. Because they’re books. It’s like throwing friends away. I just know I’m going to miss them once they’re gone, even the ones I haven’t spent time with in a while.

Still we’re trucking along, and our house is slowly getting emptier.

Step 2: Buy an RV. This was The Other Lamm’s plan to move comfortably with our pets. The wheeled beast will be our home until we find another in our new location. This should be interesting. We’ve got potential RVs narrowed down, and we’re taking steps to finally procure one. I’m not fond of RVs as a rule, but getting one means we’re another step closer to our ultimate goal, which you don’t get to know yet. It’s easier to share plans when they’re in mid-bloom than to explain why they fell apart before they ever got started.

So that’s the current story of my life. Documentation of the next steps to follow, when they’re a little less jazz and a little more—I don’t know—symphonic, I guess.

Also…

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